Uncategorized – Page 11 of 26 – Victoria Carlton ~ The Child Whisperer

May 25, 2016

Your child won’t amount to much….

Your child won’t amount to much….

At least 10 times over the last 2 years I have had sad, hurt parents tell me the teacher of their child (primary years) has cast a very negative judgement on their child. Here are a few typical ones:

“Will never be academic,” (turned out to be an A student),
“Will not amount to much,” – child picked that up and then pretty much believed it and went on to tell her Mum that the teacher “knows I will never be able to do it!”
“Will make a good hairdresser”- yes- that really WAS said! Apologies to all hairdressers as I think you are amazingly gifted!
“You need to lower your expectations because he will NEVER go to Uni- just doesn’t have the capacity.” (That one went on to top his high-school year and will definitely be going to uni!)

How can trained educators do that?

How can we judge human potential so lightly and go on to trample on everyone’s dreams?

Whenever I look at the groups I teach I am always aware that I might have an Einstein, a Richard Branson, Maria Montessori, Marie Curie or a Bill Gates sitting in front of me. They might wriggle around, show little interest and be downright non-compliant at times. So what? Maybe my chosen teaching method that day was boring. Maybe they already knew the material. Maybe they were tired or had a fight with their best friend………

Many very successful adults did very poorly at school and in fact failed!

What does that tell us?

STOP JUDGING!

It could be us as educators or our inflexible exam based system that is breaking the spirit of our children and holding up their potential.

I have met many successful people with terrible memories of school. They were made to feel stupid, inept and eventually angry and resentful. Luckily anger has lots of inherent energy and they used it to fuel their future success.

The interesting thing is that behind all these failures who made good was a parent or mentor who really believed in them.

Just one person to believe in them made the difference!

If not for Einstein’s mother the scientific world would be so much poorer.

My take-away message is two-fold:

To teachers- stop judging potential and treat EVERY child as potentially gifted. Look instead at your teaching methods.
To parents- keep believing. Refuse to swallow the negative, bitter pills given to you. Let your child know you believe in them, provide a positive learning environment and let your child’s mind unfold!

So what if they fail the test, exam or forget the facts? There is a lot more to education than those things.

We believe EVERY child is smart and this is why I wrote a book of the same name.

Refuse to believe anything less.

Contact us on 61 8 92714200 to get a copy of the book. If you are in Singapore you can purchase it from www.september21.com.sg

Email me privately on victoriacarlton@iinet.net.au if you have any matters re your children you would like to discuss.

May 24, 2016

The ABC of child whispering: M is for the MAGIC OF MOVEMENT

The ABC of child whispering: M is for the magic of movement.

I was walking our dogs by the river on Sunday, watching them enjoy the sheer joy of just moving- no destination, reason needed. Just the sheer joy of movement was driving them. I was thinking how my gym times are mostly to do with vanity and not just enjoyment and then I realised that wasn’t strictly true.

Lately I get lost in the yoga sessions and I am completely IN it and loving the feeling and movements. The same (amazingly!) is starting to happen in Body Pump and gym workouts. I am losing myself and totally IN my body and it feels good- actually GREAT!

The interesting thing is that all this movement is in fact very good for our brains and this also applies to children. They relish the joy of movement!

I love watching them engage in yoga, Brain Gym or movements from Power Brain kids (by Ilchi Lee.) Even 5 minutes of these movements seem to switch the kids at ICE onto learning and really engage them. Preceded by a short burst of creativity and Followed by 1 minute of mindfulness, we have the perfect formula to begin our sessions.

Our beginning formula is always CMM

CREATIVE/MOVEMENT/MINDFULNESS

Sadly, children often don’t do much physical movement inside classrooms but moving really enhances learning. Qxygen and blood flow to the brain increases, enjoyment and engagement levels rise and children learn more!

“Many early cognitive researchers ignored play, assuming it had nothing to do with intellectual growth. They were dead wrong. Many play-oriented movements have the capacity to improve cognition, including the following:

Exercise play (aerobics, running, chasing, dance routines).
Rough-and-tumble play (soccer, football, wrestling).
Solitary play (doing puzzles, object manipulation).
Outdoor learning activities (digging, observing insects).
Stand and stretch activities (tai chi, Simon Says).
Group or team competitive games and activities (relays, cheerleading).
Constructive play (building with blocks, model building).
Exploratory play (hide and seek, scavenger hunts, make-believe).
Functional play (purposeful play, such as practicing a new skill).
Group noncompetitive games (earth ball).
Individual competitive games (marbles, track and field, hopscotch).
Adventure or confidence play (ropes courses, trust walks).
Group noncompetitive activities (dance, drama).
Walking excursions (outdoors, indoors).

Play, recess, and physical education are essential for many brain-based (biological) reasons. Here are just some of the benefits of exercise:

It allows learners to make mistakes without “lethal” consequences (with far less embarrassment and more fun than in a traditional classroom situation).
It enhances learning (Fordyce & Wehner, 1993).
It improves the ability to handle stress by “training” the body to recover faster from the quick surges of adrenaline associated with demanding physical activity . . . and classroom environments.
It triggers the release of BDNF, brain-derived neurotrophic factor (Kesslak, Patrick, So, Cotman, & Gomez-Pinilla, 1998). This natural substance enhances cognition by boosting the neurons’ ability to communicate with one another.
It can enhance social skills, emotional intelligence, and conflict resolution ability.
Exercise may increase catecholamines (brain chemicals such as norepinephrine and dopamine), which typically serve to energize and elevate mood (Chaouloff, 1989).”

(Eric Jensen: Teaching with the brain in Mind.)

MOVEMENT in schools is never a waste of time! It will enhance and accelerate learning. We never miss it- if we did we would be missing a vital part of our teaching-learning cycle!

May 22, 2016May 22, 2016

MAD writing procedure

MAD stands for MODELLED AWESOME DAILY writing

We use many visualisations to increase the fluency and speed of children’s writing. This has been a very successful strategy and I have been trying to develop a different but as successful strategy that takes less time when we want to target specific topics, genres or spelling/grammar conventions.

MAD writing is the result and we have now used it with hundreds of children with great results!

The children enjoy it as it is fairly short, targeted and gives them great results.

They love to share their results!

This will not going to replace other forms of writing we do.

It is simply being implemented to increase writing fluency, understanding of sentences, paragraphs, grammar and to improve spelling. New topics are provided each week.

Approximately 20 mins is needed but I have often completed a lesson in 15 mins when short of time!

STEPS:

Write up topic on board.
Briefly discuss and model write YOUR response to this topic. (NOT children’s ideas) 5 mins
Children read your writing aloud. 5 mins
They write their own response 5 mins
Edit and share 5 mins (only 2/3 can share)

Only write 2-4 sentences when you are modelling. Children might write more and they might “borrow” yours. Some children might want to copy yours completely. That is valid as you are a model.

Eventually they will have the confidence to do their own.

A FEW SAMPLE TOPICS FOR A WEEK

MON- My ideal weekend.

TUES – A terrible experience.

WED – What a surprise!

THURS- My favourite unhealthy food!

FRI- If I ruled the world!

SAT- The world stopped spinning and ………

Here is an example of a lesson where I used the topic MINECRAFT to stimulate children’s writing voices!

https://youtu.be/annKAMzNq1w

Please ask any questions regarding this procedure – victoriacarlton@iinet.net.au and remember we have crafted a very practical one day course for teachers (ALL KIDS CAN WRITE) to demonstrate and explain all our writing strategies and teach you exactly how to apply each one! (Contact us for course details!)

May 13, 2016May 13, 2016

Switching off to switch on with more power!

“Please Sir, Can I have some more?” (Oliver Twist)

I am in a thinking space. A place to reflect.

I’ve only been here 3 days and the magic is already working!

Bali weaves a spell around us all and like Oliver Twist I want more!

I am working over the next 2 days giving JOLLY TRAINING in a school in Sanur and really enjoying the change of pace, beautiful environment, smiles everywhere and warmth.

I’ve had time to think hard about our educational programs and future directions.

Time to just be!

I’m always talking about Gardner’s 8 intelligences and the need to develop the Intra-personal intelligence for children.

But adults need it too. This is the one we so often ignore as we plod on and on and on without ever stopping and asking ourselves important questions such as:

Is there a better way?

Are we missing something important here?

Are we fulfilling our visions? If not- how can we adjust?

Times like this are like flight-plan adjustments!

If I can think, reflect and feel this good within 3 days – then I need it more often!

To really put 100% of our passion and energy into our lives we need this time-out to switch off, and then switch on again but with a brighter light!

The thinking and reflection I have done here will last a year- and then I’ll be back for MORE!

Thanks Bali- 3 weeks next time!

April 19, 2016April 19, 2016

The ABC of Child Whispering: M is for MAGIC and MYSTERY

I am getting ready for tomorrow’s NEW-START workshop and thinking of ways to introduce some magic and mystery to the environment.

Last year we ran this workshop in Singapore and Perth and we turned the lights out and had scores of twinkling electric stars and candles when the children came in.

The room felt like a cosy but mysterious cave and the children were all asked to remove their shoes as they entered. This signalled that we were going to be doing something quite different. We were going to get in touch with our deeper selves and try some transformation- all of us- adults and children!

We try very hard to create an air of mystery and magic at ICE and surprisingly it isn’t expensive or hard. You simply have to view the environment through the eyes of a child and then let your imagination run wild!

We have a star of learning that is switched on at every session to show how much we value learning and a learning tree complete with coloured lights that is hung with symbols of all the important learning activities we do as we go through the year.

We always have quiet, relaxing music and some soothing art/craft or books ready for the children when they arrive. I love watching the way they visibly relax as they enter this magical space and start to interact. Children are so ready to enter into their imaginations and learn when given environments such as this.

I have been into so many amazing classrooms this year to train teachers and I have seen some wonderful, inviting environments deliberately crafted by wise, child-whispering teachers who understand the effect these surroundings make for children.

Parents can create a sense of sacred importance when they eat together as a family. Simply dimming the lights and lighting a candle to represent the love of the family, can create a special atmosphere. Children are far more likely to want to talk and communicate deeply in such special spaces.

Giving ourselves a magical interlude calms us and helps us open up to each other. It is no accident that romantic restaurants have candles and dim lights! Let’s also provide those spaces for our children to nurture their wonderful sense of magic and mystery. This is how we grow the imaginations and rich neural connections children need for learning!

April 18, 2016April 18, 2016

NEW START FOR YOUR CHILDREN

How many times have you wanted to press rewind but you know this is not possible?

Children suffer from this longing as they often blurt things out and then wish they could take them back!

Sadly we can’t do this but we CAN learn from mistakes and re-group and get on track and start our lives again!

I believe we ALL need a re-start sometimes.

Children need to feel optimistic and feel they can get back on track.

We have written a transformational and very effective workshop to help children achieve this.

We call it RE-START and we have developed specific practical strategies to help children achieve this. We help them develop a sense of gratitude about themselves and what they already have and then we help them to set realistic goals.

We help them develop planning procedures and show them how to view life from the glass half full perspective.

Children are helped to become assertive, determine their strengths and weaknesses and to realise we are ALL smart! (But often in very different ways) All attending children are taken through a process to help them determine their stronger and weaker intelligences so they know how to strengthen their academic strengths by harnessing their strengths and talents!

We harness the image of the chick coming from the egg and show children that we can re-emerge with everything we already know.

Optimism can be taught but needs careful planning and persistence.

Both teachers and parents need to model optimistic behaviours by using positive language and actions. See this link for ideas to achieve this!

http://www.ahaparenting.com/parenting-tools/emotional-intelligence/optimism

There are great benefits to be had (for both children and parents) by adopting more optimistic outlooks. In our experience at ICE, children with positive outlooks are healthier, more resilient and tend to reach higher academic outcomes as they don’t allow negative self-talk to stop them!

http://stress.about.com/od/optimismspirituality/a/optimismbenefit.htm

Martin Seligman, the great expert in this area puts it so well:

“It’s a matter of ABC: When we encounter ADVERSITY, we react by thinking about it. Our thoughts rapidly congeal into BELIEFS. These beliefs may become so habitual we don’t even realize we have them unless we stop to focus on them. And they don’t just sit there idly; they have CONSEQUENCES.”

We believe these skills can be taught at an early age and will benefit children for the rest of their lives. Call us in Perth on 92714200 or email me on victoriacarlton@iinet.net.au for a comprehensive flyer about this course. Our next RE-START course will be held THIS Wed- 20-4-16

April 7, 2016April 7, 2016

Joyful Illiteracy? Yes! Yes! Yes!

While our Aussie children are stretched and snapping, children from a far away country are thriving. Can you imagine a nation revelling in words such as THE JOYFUL ILLITERACY OF KINDERGARTEN CHILDREN? Well read the link provided at the end of this article!

While we are ripping children from sandpits and block corners to give them boring workbooks, the Finns are quietly allowing (actually encouraging) their young children to play and experiment and be active and NOT stressing about literacy. In fact their children enjoy extraordinary literacy standards with far fewer tests and worksheets.

They TEACH their children rather than continually testing. Over-testing of children is like digging up beautiful, flowering, healthy rose bushes to see if they have roots. Eventually they will wither. This is happening to our children- right before our eyes!

In Finland children are encouraged to play because the well documented power of play is understood by their educators. There’s an old Finnish saying, “Those things you learn without joy you will forget easily.” I would like to see that on a poster in every classroom in the world! (Universities as well)

Every 45 minutes, children in Finnish schools are encouraged to get up and go outside to play (even in cold weather!) We know what happens when children are allowed to freely move and actually get outside- better results!

So why are we modelling our system on those that do the opposite to these practices? Erroneous thinking, lack of research and knee-jerk reactions rather than calm consideration of what is actually best for children.

Will it only be when our classrooms are full of depressed, nervous and stressed out children who are stretched to breaking point and “snapping” like dry leaves that we will consider change? Well that is already happening. Even ONE child snapping and losing joy, confidence and a sense of I CAN is too many!

It’s time to say WE WERE WRONG and allow children to become children once more. Maybe it’s time to celebrate the joyful illiteracy of our own pre-schoolers and leave them in the sandpits if we want the high literacy standards enjoyed in Finland.

I’m off to jump in our sand-pit with some playful, creative pre-schoolers……..

http://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2015/10/the-joyful-illiterate-kindergartners-of-finland/408325/

April 7, 2016April 7, 2016

The ABC OF CHILD WHISPERING L is for limiting thoughts and beliefs

New mindset new results motivational phrase sign on old wood with blurred background

Yesterday I was talking to a bunch of young people at our centre- upper primary and secondary.

They were talking about how scary the forthcoming NAPLAN tests are for them. One of the students was very worried about a test she had coming up at school today.

I suddenly realised I was confronting a dense smog of self-limiting beliefs and that it was worth taking some time away from our writing lesson to help the children see what they were doing.

I reminded them that repeating these negative affirmations was just making the likelihood of failure more likely!

We looked at how simply worrying about NAPLAN could ruin the forthcoming holidays and not help one iota. We then examined how taking a positive attitude and using positive affirmations would be likely to lead to higher marks. (Along with some judicious practice and well applied study skills!)

We discussed the pointlessness of obsessively worrying about the questions that MIGHT occur. It is a far better strategy to write down the questions that would be most difficult and then write answers.

Playing WORST QUESTIONS EVER is actually a very positive strategy where children together write the hardest questions they can think of and then collaboratively set out to answer them!

Chances are that they will actually get easier questions and even if they don’t- they will not have spent days or weeks worrying themselves into a negative wormhole!

The limiting thoughts and beliefs we carry from childhood have a massive impact on our adult lives and in turn get visited on our loved ones.

Common examples are I AM HOPELESS AT MATHS, I AM NOT SMART, I WILL NEVER HAVE ANY MONEY, I WILL NEVER BE SUCCESSFUL, PEOPLE DON’T LIKE ME, I DON’T HAVE MANY FRIENDS, I WILL NEVER PASS THE EXAM…………

We deal with these negative self-beliefs within all our learning sessions and in particular during our evidence-based EQ4KIDZ course.

Children need to be helped to squash these thoughts and place them under a “microscope” to see how damaging they really are. Then they need to be shown how to use positive affirmations that can be immediately substituted for negative thoughts.

Children and teenagers CAN be empowered to overcome these self-limiting beliefs. It just takes time, sensitive, deep listening and a willingness to demonstrate and scaffold thinking techniques that need to be applied. Our young people are often very stressed and worried at this PRE-NAPLAN time and they need our calm support!

March 11, 2016March 11, 2016

THE SYSTEM IS BROKEN – HARD TIMES ARE BACK!

Our education system is broken.
We have lost the plot – seriously!
We treat children like vessels to be filled with knowledge- like Mr Thomas Gradgrind, the school board superintendent, in Charles Dicken’s “Hard Times.”
“Now, what I want is Facts. Teach these boys and girls nothing but Facts. Facts alone are wanted in life. Plant nothing else, and root out everything else. You can only form the minds of reasoning animals upon Facts; nothing else will ever be of any service to them.”

There are more and more schools that rip kindergarten children from the sandpits and plop them in front of boring workbooks, taking them away from play-based learning and thrusting them into formal school learning – all in the name of acceleration. Acceleration for what? Acceleration towards boredom and disengagment!

Some schools have the stated aim of getting all the children to be 1 year ahead before they get into year one! Why? What will this tension lead to?

Broken children will be the end results and already our level of anxiety amongst children has grown to worrying levels.
https://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/lifestyle/a/25294925/anxiety-rising-among-children/
We are enrolling more and more children who are very anxious about NAPLAN, reports, academic performance and not managing to get all their homework done!
Schools are discussing children in terms of marks, stanines and percentages – not needs, personalities and learning styles.
The humanity, fun and excitement has gone from education and will continue to go.
Just over the last 7 days I have met broken children who believe they are failures at 8 years of age! I have met broken teachers who love children but have been instructed that children are no longer at the centre of the educational stage – it is all about exams results and, marks.
Even children are now describing themselves using the marks they get. I have children who have told me they desperately want to achieve a pass or get better than a C but believe this is no longer possible.

I have seen many reports that tell the exact position children come in their class. That is unbelievable and unacceptable in this day and age. It has to be stopped.
We are dishonouring our children and robbing them of motivation, hope and love of education. We CAN improve standards and reform our education system without taking away all the hope, enthusiasm, fun and creativity and breaking the hearts of the next generation!

March 8, 2016March 8, 2016

The ABC of Child Whispering: L IS FOR LISTENING

Natural child whisperers LISTEN to children and know how to kid-watch.

Everyone can learn this- it just requires us to shut down our internal chatter for a while and just observe and listen deeply.

When we listen like this something different is happening. It is not just our ears working- our eyes, hearts and brains are all working to help us UNDERSTAND and you cannot do this at speed.

The problem is that often we think we know what children need and so often we are wrong.

One of the best questions I ever ask children is, “What do you think you need? Are we helping you? Is there anything else we could do?”
I have had some surprising and very perceptive answers. Children (if allowed to speak for themselves and not rushed) have a pretty clear idea of how they learn and what is helpful in terms of teaching input.

This also works for behavioural issues.
”What would help you to stop getting in to trouble like this? What do you need?”
Then let them take their time, draw their responses, think for a while, even make a time to chat on a different day to allow them to think deeply.

No child wants to be in constant trouble, excluded from class, shamed and embarrassed. Give them the chance to delve deeply and come up with their own solution. That sometimes involved throwing out preconceived notions and that can be hard.

The more we are sure we are right- the more we’re not!

Try it today. Don’t be on the lookout for bad behaviour. We’re not prison warders. Be on the lookout for good behaviour and reward it- every time! Wrap your pre-conceived notions up and stick them in the bottom drawer. Clear your mind and LISTEN!

All teachers and parents should be grateful for the Greek philosopher, Epictetus who reminded us we have 2 ears but only one mouth. The equation is very clear.

LISTEN twice as much as you speak.

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